The Circle of Goddesses

So many people have a negative view of love. When they think of love they think of the pain, misery, betrayal and hurt that comes with it. Their past experiences have made them see love as something they want and something that will also hurt them. Of course there is a risk every time you let someone into your heart, but there are ways to minimize the chances of getting hurt.

If they don’t open up and share feelings or tell you they have a problem doing so, this may not be the right person for you. It’s fine that they love you, but if they don’t ever tell you, that may not be enough for you.

Are they single? If not then they are not available to you right now. Not 100 percent. And you don’t know when they will be. If you are going to go down this path know that this road can be a long and winding one, with no end in sight.

This article is not about how to trap a man and get him to be yours forever and ever but the ways women often trap men into falling flat on their faces. Quite often women set men up for failure, and then get upset when they (the women) feel hurt, slighted, or unloved. Every woman has the right to feel unloved if the person she is involved with is not showing loving behavior towards her. The problem is, some women attach feeling “unloved” to every little thing.

Now if your boyfriend or husband knows it is your birthday and doesn’t wish you a happy birthday, get you anything, or acknowledge it in any way shape or form, sure, you can feel upset and hurt and rightfully so. BUT, if you told your man not to do anything for your birthday and did not WANT it acknowledged in any way shape or form WHY are you now upset because he didn’t?  Sorry, that one is on you. You set him up to hurt you.

Why play games like that where everyone loses? If the man in your life responds to your telephone messages and emails right away, but hates texting and does not respond to texts, WHY ARE YOU INSISTING ON TEXTING HIM? So you can get mad at him? Why force the text issue where there are other ways of communicating? And if that isn’t bad enough, some women have men that are basically good, show loving behavior towards them, treat them well, but the ONE time he doesn’t do what she wants he MUST not love her. Really? Grow up.

People will not always do everything perfect, and you won’t either. Sometimes you have to look at the big picture, not every little thing all by itself. So he screwed up one time. Let it slide unless of course it is a BIG screw-up. If you were the perfect employee and had ONE bad day, would you want your future with the company, your reputation, your bonus, and your pay to be judged on that ONE day? Hell no. You would insist that all your hard work over the years count for something. Well, it is the same in relationships too.

If you ask him stupid questions like “What don’t you like about me?” then you are obviously looking for a fight if you can’t hear the answer and suck it up like an adult. Don’t ask for the truth unless you are ready to hear it and behave like an adult.

If every person could read everyone else’s mind there would BE no relationships. Think about some of the thoughts and feelings that go through your head on a daily basis. What if the people in your life heard them all? Would they hate you right now? Would they even be speaking to you right now? Would you even have a job if your boss heard every thought in your head? Probably NOT.

So, why snoop and read emails he sends to other people? What are you really looking for? If your relationship sucks that bad that you need to find out if he is cheating, checking into things is not so bad. But do you have to read the email he sends his mother or best friend?

The bottom line is that relationships are hard enough, and if you have a good one, be glad you do, and don’t look for ways to cause trouble or ways to sabotage it.