The COG Blog

This article is not about how to trap a man and get him to be yours forever and ever but the ways women often trap men into falling flat on their faces. Quite often women set men up for failure, and then get upset when they (the women) feel hurt, slighted, or unloved. Every woman has the right to feel unloved if the person she is involved with is not showing loving behavior towards her. The problem is, some women attach feeling “unloved” to every little thing.

Now if your boyfriend or husband knows it is your birthday and doesn’t wish you a happy birthday, get you anything, or acknowledge it in any way shape or form, sure, you can feel upset and hurt and rightfully so. BUT, if you told your man not to do anything for your birthday and did not WANT it acknowledged in any way shape or form WHY are you now upset because he didn’t?  Sorry, that one is on you. You set him up to hurt you.

Why play games like that where everyone loses? If the man in your life responds to your telephone messages and emails right away, but hates texting and does not respond to texts, WHY ARE YOU INSISTING ON TEXTING HIM? So you can get mad at him? Why force the text issue where there are other ways of communicating? And if that isn’t bad enough, some women have men that are basically good, show loving behavior towards them, treat them well, but the ONE time he doesn’t do what she wants he MUST not love her. Really? Grow up.

People will not always do everything perfect, and you won’t either. Sometimes you have to look at the big picture, not every little thing all by itself. So he screwed up one time. Let it slide unless of course it is a BIG screw-up. If you were the perfect employee and had ONE bad day, would you want your future with the company, your reputation, your bonus, and your pay to be judged on that ONE day? Hell no. You would insist that all your hard work over the years count for something. Well, it is the same in relationships too.

If you ask him stupid questions like “What don’t you like about me?” then you are obviously looking for a fight if you can’t hear the answer and suck it up like an adult. Don’t ask for the truth unless you are ready to hear it and behave like an adult.

If every person could read everyone else’s mind there would BE no relationships. Think about some of the thoughts and feelings that go through your head on a daily basis. What if the people in your life heard them all? Would they hate you right now? Would they even be speaking to you right now? Would you even have a job if your boss heard every thought in your head? Probably NOT.

So, why snoop and read emails he sends to other people? What are you really looking for? If your relationship sucks that bad that you need to find out if he is cheating, checking into things is not so bad. But do you have to read the email he sends his mother or best friend?

The bottom line is that relationships are hard enough, and if you have a good one, be glad you do, and don’t look for ways to cause trouble or ways to sabotage it.

A few women were recently discussing relationships and one was mentioning that her new, less than 6 months old, relationship had numerous issues and problems they couldn’t get past. One woman suggested couples counseling. I was stunned. Other women at the table agreed it might be a good idea. I was more stunned.

Once I picked my jaw off the floor I said “Why not end it?”. The women turned to me and they were stunned.

“Why end it?” one said.

I asked “Why continue when the signs are so obvious and numerous that is not the right relationship?” I went on to explain that dating is a process we are supposed to use to find the right one for us, and if he is not, let him go and keep looking.

Women now seem to find the wrong guy and then try and make him the right guy! This works less than 1% of the time, if that. They waste years and years crying, fighting, and for what?

Is this really less work and more fun than dumping the wrong guy and putting that same effort into finding the right one? Is it really easier to have the same jamoke do that same shit that pissed you off the last 100 times he did it than to try and find someone who won’t do that to you?

Is it more fun to be disappointed when the same promises are broken time and time again as opposed to trying to find someone whose promise is something more than lip service? Is it more entertaining to try and force, mold, and shape someone into what you want them to be (and they fight you every step of the way) than to find someone who is that guy already? Don’t tell me its hard to find the right guy when you aren’t even lookingand instead wasting time with the wrong one. Don’t complain that you don’t want to be alone when you are with someone who makes you feel alone even when they are there. Don’t tell me you can invest time, energy, effort, tears, etc on the wrong guy, but you can’ invest in yourself? Why don’t you stop trying to make dysfunctional, failing relationships work, and instead focus on you. It is better use of your time, resources and energy.

ARE YOU CONFUSED ABOUT WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP? ARE YOU STRUGGLING TO FIGURE OUT IF IT IS TIME TO MOVE ON OR IF IT IS WORTH FIXING? SOPHIA AND LADY SARAH ARE ABLE TO SEE DEEP INTO THE HEART OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP ISSUES TO SEE WHERE THEY ARE BROKEN. IF IT IS FIXABLE THEY WILL GIVE YOU THE TOOLS TO FIX IT. IF IT IS BROKEN BEYOND REPAIR THEY WILL HELP YOU MOVE ON. GIVE THEM A CALL TODAY AND STOP WASTING TIME IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT IS MAKING YOU UNHAPPY! THEY ARE HERE TO HELP!

Allow me to assist you in breaking through the barriers that hold you back from achieving your full potential in life, love, romance, career and business to put you on the right path to success and personal freedom.

I will guide you along your path and provide guidance to help you attain the desires of your heart in matters of love, life and career. I will assist you in finding balance in your spiritual, personal and professional life as well as attain peace of mind and the right path for your future.

Psychic Lady Sarah and psychic Sophia offer private psychic readings via click4advisor. Simply sign up with click4advisor and get your psychic reading today! All psychic readings are private and the psychic reader is never given your personal information. Our qualified professional psychic readers are available 24/7, ready to give you the best psychic reading possible. At this time are psychic readers are available only by phone. Our psychic readers are not offering email psychic readings at this time. Both of our psychic readers are gifted tarot readers and clairvoyant psychic readers. Our psychic readers are known relationship experts, and your psychic reading can help in all affairs of the heart. One phone call with our psychic readers can help you in areas of love, career, relationships, finance, etc. Soon our psychics will be giving free minutes after your first call, so check back with our psychics to find out when you can get some free minutes towards your next psychic reading. Give one of our professional accurate psychic readers a telephone call, you will be glad you did. If you prefer, you can arrange a call with our psychic readers to get your psychic reading or request an appointment with our psychic readers. Our psychic readers are here for you, and want to help. Pick up the phone and give them a call.

So many women say they want closure yet have a hard time finding it. They wonder why they can’t free themselves from thoughts and emotions regarding their exes. They say they don’t want to think about their ex-boyfriend or ex-husband but their minds always seem to drift in that direction. They can’t sleep at night because their exes are on their minds and when they wake up in the morning they remember the dream they had about him while they were sleeping.

Why is closure so elusive for so many women? Could women actually be sabotaging themselves from getting the closure they profess to want so desperately? Or maybe they don’t really want closure but use their need to have it as a way to keep them locked in their obsessive, unproductive thoughts of getting back together with their ex.

Here are some ways that women keep themselves in limbo rather than get closure:

Needing to know: What is he doing right now? Is he hurting? Does he miss me? Does he regret losing me? Does he plan on reuniting with me? Is he happy that it is over? Is he ready to date someone else? Is he ready to sleep with someone else? Has he slept or dated someone else? Does he care about her? Was the sex good? How can he act like nothing is wrong when I am devastated ? Will he ever find someone he loves more than me? Did he actually love me?

What difference does the answer to any of the questions make in your life? These questions are all about HIM, not YOU. No wonder you can’t move on and move forward!!! The answers will not give you closure, because you will only have MORE questions!

Women have wonderful imaginations and are curious by nature. So if we can’t talk to our ex or find out what is going on, we can simply fantasize about it! You can imagine telling him all the horrible things he has done and why he doesn’t deserve to be back with you, you can imagine tears running down his face when he says how sorry he is, you can go over conversations over and over and over again so you know just what to say should you ever see/talk to him. You can picture him miserable, broken down and suffering. The problem is you are living in your imagination too much rather than accepting your reality and dealing with it.

Taking walks down memory lane: While men try to avoid anything that could remind them of their ex, women tend to do the opposite. Women will re-read emails and letters to the point that they have them memorized. That takes them on a literary journey through the relationship they just got out of and re-opens the wounds so they cannot heal. In most cases at times of breakups, women tend to focus on the “shiny happy times” before your ex showed his true colors. We think of all the things we will miss, how the relationship could have worked “If only he ____”, and the pure shame of it all. What women DON’T tend to focus on is the bad side of their ex and all the reasons why it didn’t work out. What they need to realize though is that the signs were probably there from the beginning. Instead of thinking of all the wonderfulness of your ex, think about how much he made you cry, how often you were disappointed, dissatisfied, insecure, angry, hurt, etc.

But don’t dwell on that either because you still won’t get closure. Give yourself ample time to grieve the death of the relationship and then switch your gears to enjoying your LIFE again. You did before he showed up and you can do it now that he is gone.

For more articles on CLOSURE and how to get it in relationships, visit www.iwantclosure.com

With astrology we can analyze the birth chart and determine certain personality traits and characteristics of any individual, as well as the life path they will take. Certain transits in the birth chart, and at times, transiting planets, will determine the answer to the question, “Will He/She Cheat.”

While transits may determine the probability of a cheater, it is important to remember that while a person may have the transits to be a cheater, all individuals have control over their own brain and actions. Sometimes, these tendencies are curbed by conditioning, religious beliefs and maturity.

Having the transits of a cheater doesn’t mean you have to fulfill that role. But, in all probability, in this day and age, chances are strong that if an individual was born with ‘cheating’ transits they will cheat. Sometimes, events (transits) occur that cause a cheater to change their ways, and sometimes these events never occur and the person never changes. That is usually the case. Sometimes, an individual who is not ‘born to cheat,’ gets caught up in situations and makes a decision to stray from an established relationship. This is astrologically speaking, a horse of another color than a ‘born cheater.’

To know if your significant other/interest is a ‘born cheater,’ the transits in the birth chart must be carefully analyzed. There is no single transit for a cheater, there are probably millions. There are no simple generalizations. Often, cheaters are born with planets that represent divorce. This is usually represented by some type of hard aspect between Uranus, and Venus, or Mars and Venus. But, every divorced person is not a cheater. And, at times they are the victims of cheaters.

Cheating birth charts almost always contain a hard Neptune aspect. Neptune is the planet of illusion, delusion and confusion, and well as secrets and lies. A person with prominent Neptune aspects in their chart can soar to the highest of highs, touching the divine or they can sink to the lowest depths of human depravity. Sometimes, in a life time they do both.

Neptune represents both the preacher, the spiritual guru, and the drug addict and the prostitute. It’s a complex planet. But, it’s often there when cheating is involved. Neptune can create a cheater sometimes when it’s touching Venus, Mars or Mercury, especially from the seventh house of marriage. But, this is a generalization again, and this transit alone does not guarantee a cheater, and Neptune in the seventh house can also represent a person who is going to be cheated on. Another possibility of a cheater is someone who has a lot of Gemini or Sagittarius in their chart and likes to keep things interesting.

These individuals are often not satisfied with just one partner and like to experiment and have a distaste for that which becomes mundane. But again, having multiple planets in these signs alone does not guarantee multiple partners. Mars or Pluto in the eighth house is another sign of a person who loves sex.

These people are usually more interested in the erotic side of life than most. This depends upon many factors including what aspects Mars or Pluto in the eighth house is making. Society began to change in the late fifties/early sixties, and a generation was born with Neptune is Scorpio (1957-1970). These individuals in particular, are sometimes unclear about sexual boundaries.

Again, this is a generalization, and if you were born during these years it is absolutely no guarantee you will cheat! But, Scorpio is the natural ruler of the eighth house of shared/joint finances, change and transformation and sex. Sex often has a great fascination for these individuals and some will experience vague and uncertain states connected to emotional and sexual involvement with others. Sometimes it exerts a magnetic influence, although the real thing often does not meet expectations.

So, while there are a million fourteen transits that will help identify a cheater, the entire chart must come under scrutiny before making that accessment. And it all really comes down to what we want as individuals and what price they we willing to pay for it.

used with permission from Leslie Hale, Astrolger

The psychics from the Circle of Goddesses are able to give you insight in love, romance, relationships, career and finance or spiritual growth. You may speak with them by clicking on their Click4Advisor call buttons below. To learn more about our expert psychic advisors, click on the picture below.

I will guide you along your path and provide guidance to help you attain the desires of your heart in matters of love, life and career. I will assist you in finding balance in your spiritual, personal and professional life as well as attain peace of mind and the right path for your future.

Psychic Lady Sarah and psychic Sophia offer private psychic readings via click4advisor. Simply sign up with click4advisor and get your psychic reading today! All psychic readings are private and the psychic reader is never given your personal information. Our qualified professional psychic readers are available 24/7, ready to give you the best psychic reading possible. At this time are psychic readers are available only by phone. Our psychic readers are not offering email psychic readings at this time. Both of our psychic readers are gifted tarot readers and clairvoyant psychic readers. Our psychic readers are known relationship experts, and your psychic reading can help in all affairs of the heart. One phone call with our psychic readers can help you in areas of love, career, relationships, finance, etc. Soon our psychics will be giving free minutes after your first call, so check back with our psychics to find out when you can get some free minutes towards your next psychic reading. Give one of our professional accurate psychic readers a telephone call, you will be glad you did. If you prefer, you can arrange a call with our psychic readers to get your psychic reading or request an appointment with our psychic readers. Our psychic readers are here for you, and want to help. Pick up the phone and give them a call.